Adho Mukha Vrksasana, or Handstand. When I think of what the ultimate posture would be, it would be that. Every muscle in your body has to be used, every bit of energy has to be centered. You have to trust yourself enough to know you will not fall. This is what I want. This is what I will do.
About a year ago, I could not hold a plank. Not even kidding. No upper body strength, whatsoever. Blow drying my damn hair was enough of a challenge. But I've been working on it, and it shows in my practice. Now that I have actually joined a studio and will begin my teacher training, I can only get better from here, right?
Teacher training ends on December 16th. My birthday is December 20th. It may be overly ambitious, but that's what I want for my birthday. To make handstand mine.
Being upside down is no joke. Besides the feeling of the blood rushing to your head, the fear of toppling over any moment, and amount of focus needed, you have to use every single muscle to hold yourself there. I set a goal to get myself into one of the versions of headstand and hit the ground running... well, hit the ground. A lot.
The very first time I tried an inversion, I was terrified. I had tried a few prep poses, to get used to the feeling of having my torso above my head, and didn't like it one bit. About a month into it, I was at the gym with my friend, Marla. Looked at her and said, "Hey, I need you to help hold up my legs, I'm going to try a headstand." Poor thing has had to listen to me rant and rave about yoga since I starting practicing again so she knew where I was headed with that. She gave me the most surprised look and said, "Damn, I knew you had goals, but I didn't know you wanted to achieve them TODAY!"
I had watched a ton of videos and read articles on form and alignment, thinking that I would totally nail it first time up. Boy, was I wrong. Getting into position facing the mirror, I hoisted myself up into Salamba Sirsasana (supported headstand). Marla helped to bring my flailing legs up against the mirror. I thought I was going to throw up. It was disorienting and I couldn't activate my core or my shoulder muscles to support me. But leaned against the mirror, Marla took the very first photo. I hated how it felt, but I was stoked.
The next few weeks were filled with me trying it every day. Against a wall, without a wall. It was infuriating when I couldn't shift my weight over my head and hold it. One night I tried it over 70 times (yes, I counted). I strained my neck and back to the point I couldn't work out for a week. I have fallen more times than I could possibly count. Sometimes I would cry in frustration that I wasn't getting it. When I finally got to the point where I could hold myself in headstand, it was the most incredible feeling! It felt like I had done the impossible.
I wouldn't recommend that everyone just try this potentially dangerous posture. I wasn't supervised by a trained yogi nor did I have years of practice. It was my sheer stubbornness that led me to try it, and I was lucky I didn't really hurt myself. And for me, that was enough. I never thought I would see the day that I was upside down. There are still so many variations I haven't done. I'm still so far from hitting it perfectly, and the wall is still my best friend, But I did it. I'm doing it. I'm inverted.
Five months ago, I brought out my old yoga mat and set a goal: I will yoga every day for 30 days. It started with an article I read about a woman who set a goal of practicing yoga every day for 30 days. The 30 days then became 365. The idea of making a promise to yourself and keeping it seemed simple enough. It also seemed really hard. So I gave it a go.
I started watching YouTube videos and came across a yogi named Adriene that had a 30 day yoga challenge. How fitting! I began reading any and every article I could on yoga. On different yogis, on asanas, on meditation. I downloaded yoga and meditation apps on my phone. I scoured Amazon for good deals on yoga equipment. I practiced every chance I got. By the end of 30 days, I was hooked. I couldn't get enough of it. Something inside had been awoken and there was no going back. I became a yogi.
Yoga isn't just about making beautiful poses for an Instagram post. It brings an awareness not only to the world around you, but of yourself. A practice can be anything from just for personal health and fitness to a complete spiritual journey. Everyone's path is so different, and they are all so beautiful. Having that "Wow" moment when you nail a pose or moment of complete clarity is unlike anything else I've ever experienced.
So much has changed for me in those 5 months. It is about to change so much more. On October 7th, I will take my journey as a yogi to another level: I am going to become a certified yoga teacher. This involves 200 hours of lecture and practice in 10 weeks. Sounds intense. It will be intense. But I am so ready.
The article that changed my world: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/stephanie-baronicook/yoga-every-day-year_b_7041176.html
You can find Yoga with Adriene here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCFKE7WVJfvaHW5q283SxchA
